5 WAYS TO DEAL WITH CHEATERS IN LOVE ..........
1. Accept the truth: Realizing the person you’ve trusted with your most sensitive vulnerabilities and trust has betrayed you is incredibly painful. In response to this pain, we initially deny the truth or at best try to rationalize it. But you’ll never live a happy and meaningful life that’s based on a lie. The sooner you accept the truth of what happened, the sooner you can heal from it.
2. Speak the truth: Because there’s so much shame and humiliation surrounding infidelity, we’re terrified to talk about it. But this only serves to amplify the pain and make us feel more like victims. Get the truth out into the light. It’s been popularly argued that a problem shared is a problem half-solved. Talk about your experience with a family member, a trusted friend or a relationships counselor.
3. Breathe through the truth: Breathe! Breathe! Breathe! This is a phrase commonly used to help relieve physical pain and it’s equally applicable to our emotional distress. Even though every fiber of your being wants to react, avoid acting from a place of pain or anger. The best way to reclaim your dignity is to act rationally and to treat yourself lovingly. Don’t self-destruct, and don’t try to destroy your partner..
4. Process the truth: Give yourself time and space to find your equilibrium. Infidelity shatters our world. It makes us feel unsafe and vulnerable. Know that you’ll heal from this pain and establish a new, stronger foundation. Know also that this will take time. Give yourself that time. Time is your best ally, give it a chance and you will be shocked at how much it makes a difference.
5. Create a plan based on the truth: Often infidelity doesn’t necessarily mean the end of a relationship, but it will permanently change your dynamic with your partner. Don’t expect the relationship to go back to the way it was pre-infidelity. You will need to redefine how do you want to live your life from now on. Carefully draft a plan for your life with any idea about the person you want to be and the goals you want to achieve in your relationship. Once you have clarity on this, you can take concrete steps toward realizing those goals.
While infidelity is devastating, it does not need to ruin you. It may fill you with crushing pain, but this pain will subside. It may fill you with negative thoughts about yourself, but these thoughts do not define you and should not determine the course of your life. Above all else, know you’re not alone. There are millions of other men and women who have gone through this and have moved beyond their pain. They learned how to love again by learning to accept and nurture themselves.